Monday, March 30, 2009


500 channels and sometimes you just can't find anything good to watch on TV.

I remember the days when we only got 5 channels, and 2 of those didn't come in good enough to bother with. Those were the days when I was my father's personal remote control. My dad learned the art of channel surfing long before a remote was ever placed into his hand. But I digress...

Anyway, I had a friend over the other day and there was absolutely nothing good on TV and nothing good saved on my Tivo. After a little channel surfing, we discovered "World's Largest Chinese Restaurant". I just knew this would have to be good for a laugh or two. T and I weren't disappointed we chose this show. First of all, it was all subtitled because everyone spoke Chinese (apparently the world's largest Chinese restaurant is in China...go figure), and subtitles are always funny. Then we tune in to find a baby kissing a fish for good luck. Priceless.

Some family had rented out the restaurant to celebrate the birth of their son. I'm guessing this is a much bigger deal in China than I ever realized. There were over 400 people coming to this celebration. We had to watch through about 10 minutes of the baby kissing fish and getting smathered with a raw egg (probably for more good luck) before we hit Jackpot!

One of the male family members stood up in front of 400 guests and said, "Comrades, today we welcome a new penis in the family!" I thought T and I were going to die laughing. I'm not sure if he said something that didn't translate well, or if he really did say that, but either way... it was hilarious.

So next time a friend or family member is blessed with a son...don't be afraid to celebrate by saying, "Comrades, today we welcome a new penis in the family!"

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